3 – Muffin chooses a first class

The Care Bear Studio proposes a varied array of classes. From Yoga to Musculation, there is something for everybody. Muffins looked at the planning, frowning doubtfully.

“All those classes have really weird names, she remarked.

-I think you should start with something rather low impact, like Pilates, Essentrics, or Yoga maybe? I do Essentrics myself, but I could…

-Low impact? Certainly not! If it’s to roll around on a mat while weaving myself into knots, I can do that at home, thank you very much. I want something I’ll feel for real! What is this one?

-TRX? 

-That’s the one with the straps you’re always going on about, isn’t it?

-Yes, it’s very good for your core, and your muscular…

-Will it make me thin? 

-Well, I mean, you will burn calories, definitely, but you know, losing weight is just a question of using more calories than you…

-Yay, yay, right. I’ll do that, then.”

I sighed. Being friend with Muffin means learning to rework your sentences by putting the important things first, because you’ll never be able to finish a single one. I should know that by this time… The end of a sentence is for Muffin what nuclear war is for most people: something unthinkable you need to avoid at all cost. I mean the end of other people’s sentences, obviously, not hers. She will go ballistics if she can’t finish hers.

Anyway, the very next day she came with me to the TRX class. She was welcomed in the Care Bear studio as if she was a long lost friend, and went through the class like a champ. At least, it was my impression. Sure, she looked somewhat red in the face, and her fur soon looked shabby and drab, but it is to be expected during a good TRX class.

Side planks are awesome! And you’re doing a great job Muffin, with your arm up and all!!

I got somewhat worried at the end, because she stayed on the ground for a long time and could only point a shaky finger at me when I asked if she had liked it.

Turns out the finger was accusatory.

“You lied to me”, she gasped when she could speak. “You pretended to enjoy this! You tricked me!”

I helped her on her feet and assured her that I did not pretend, I really enjoyed it. She glared at me.

“You’re not even red! You’re not even sweaty! How is that even possible?”

I showed her that my hands were quite unsteady, and told her that my arms felt wobbly.

“You call that shaking?” she laughed, and she pointed out her floppy limbs poking jerkily in random directions. “You’ll have to tie my shoes for me! If I can control my feet long enough to put them in my shoes!”

The TRX instructor – a nice Tiger with a roaring laugh – reassured her by saying that it was quite normal for a first time, and everything went very well, and she’ll soon get used to it.

AH AH AH AH AH AH AH Warm-up is almost over!

“Also, you know, Muffin, ventured I, you don’t have to go all in, like, 110%, and give it everything you got… You could, you know, start slowly…”

The Tiger roared of laughter and opined that it was more prudent when starting. Then he told us to go home and eat something, and roared again.

Muffin moaned all the way home.

When we separated, as I was telling her to hydrate well and maybe take a warm bath with epsom salt, she said:

“Blue, maybe I should have listened to you and start with something less… you know… intense… Could we try that class you talked about, the quiet one?

-Of course Muffin! Whenever you want!

-As soon as I can move normally again, she murmured with a point of bitterness in her voice.

-It can help, you know, if you feel sore tomorrow, to do a class like Essentrics!”

She looked at me suspiciously, as if unsure whether I was pulling her leg or not, and as I assured her that I was serious, she sighed as if she was Thor deciding to trust Loki just once more after he has betrayed him and his people for the 10th time.